A longtime reader, Connor, recently sent me a question that I thought the rest of you may find interesting. Not having a lot of personal experience with this issue, I could only give my gut feeling as advice. Luckily, though, I have a few friends in the sex industry that could offer more qualified advice. I’m sure Connor would love to have advice from any of you, as well, whether you have experience in this industry or just a hunch you’d like to share.
Hey, Misty. I’d like your thoughts on something. I’ve thought about seeing an escort, as I’ve been going through some frustrations with the opposite sex. I’d be interested in voyeuristic stuff like more explicit strip shows, erotic massages with happy endings, or even seeing her have sex with a guy (kind of like when I heard you and Fingers). My thing is, I won’t be able to have sex with her. I’m a blood donor, and the blood center has a rule that you can’t donate for a while if you pay for sex, regardless of if a condom was used; and “sex” also includes oral and anal. (Strict rule, but that’s the name of the game.) I’m worried that if the escort asks why I don’t want to have sex with her, and I give this answer, I’ll come across as insensitive or insulting. What do you think? I do want to have some sort of activity with a woman, but donating blood is important to me, too. Should I instead settle for a stripper service, like the girls that perform for bachelor parties, and leave the more intimate activities for another day, whenever that will be?
My own response:
I think that prostitutes encounter all kinds of situations, and would not be phased by a client that does not want to have sex. I’m willing to bet (and know from stories from friends who are sex workers) that a lot of people request more voyeuristic activities. If she asks if you’d like to have sex, you can just say “No thanks, I just want to watch,” or “a happy ending is all I need.” You don’t have to go any further. It’s unlikely she’d ask why, but if she did you can just say “it’s just what I like,” and leave it at that.
A response from former escort Amy Nicole:
I think that as long as he’s honest and respectful, and doesn’t pick a girl off the back of the Stranger, he should be fine.
I mean, I’m totally happy to hear “I have this philanthropic thing…” and I think most escorts would be too. It gives him something interesting and makes the girl feel happy to be working with him.
And from Jemma:
I dont see the problem, really. Totally acceptable to many/most providers… and not particularly rare, even. Because of my niche market, these guys are some what occasional for me, but still not even surprising at this point.
Also, I saw this a week or so ago and immediately remembered it when I saw this question. (#2)
One thing to consider. In a police sting, cops in some departments/jurisdictions have different procedures, warrants (etc), and interpretation of the fine print… But, a common thing that a lot of girls say should set off your pig-dar is when the client asks you to get undressed but will not undress himself first. So, many girls start their sessions off asking the guy to get undressed aka “get cleaned up”
So, is he cool with being naked, just no sex? Then I dont see many providers complaining….. Just maybe a few thinking it was weird and erring on the side of caution, but not
Maybe he needs to just find the right provider that seems like shes really open minded and maybe a bit kinky and wild… or also a girl who SAYS she loves to dance or stripping. Then just give it a shot after calling to get an impression and/or reading reviews.
Hope that helps
Thanks girls! Does anyone else have any advice on this?